Sunday, 23 October 2016

One day at a time...

We miss Wiggle so much.  Every single day, we miss him.  He was such a big part of our lives and even though he had been less active in his old age, home seems so empty without him.

Even in his old age, Wiggle was a character.  He would follow me to the kitchen and look at me with a quizzical expression, hoping for a snack.  I would sneak him a biscuit while Sofy wasn't looking.  When we went for our little walks, he would go where he wanted, even if he needed to pull me.  When he decided he didn't want to eat from his food bowl I would feed him by hand, which he approved of.  

It will get easier, I know, but at the moment it's still very strange to not have Wiggle here.  His ashes are home and I thought that would bring some peace but sadly, not yet.  I know without any doubt that it was the right time to let him go but knowing that doesn't lessen the sadness.

Meanwhile, Sofy is being a Very Good Girl and I guess it's an adjustment for both of us.  I watch her on the camera from work and she sleeps in the armchair or on the rug if there's a sunpuddle.

Since she's been on her own, Sofy plays with toys again, something she hadn't done for a while.  In Wiggle's latter months, he lost interest in toys and Sofy did too but now she makes me smile by whapping a toy or pushing one at me so I'll play tuggy with her.

While our autumnal weather has been good, we've been getting out, going across the fields nearby and up to the Downs, trying to think of the many happy memories of Wiggle being with us on our walks.  

I know that in time the happy memories will take away the sadness, but for now, we just take each day one day at a time.

Monday, 10 October 2016

One week on

Needless to say, a week on from saying goodbye I am still thinking about Wiggle all of the time.  He was such a huge part of my life that it doesn't surprise me how much of my mind space he occupies.  I miss him so much, it physically hurts.

The response to losing Wiggle has been overwhelming.  I knew he was special but the lovely messages, cards and flowers have meant so much and I want to thank everyone for their kindness and support at this terribly sad time.  To know that Wiggle touched so many people's hearts makes me very proud to have been his human.

Sofy seems to be doing ok on her own although I'm not sure she fully understands but maybe she does.  I'm so glad she is still her for me to hug when I cry and to be my companion.

Wiggle's tag from his collar is now on my key ring with the others from my past Labbie companions.  He gets to travel everywhere with me now.  

I didn't look for Wiggle - he came to me when he needed me most and whilst I'm not looking for another Labrador, I will foster again in the future.  

For now, I shall enjoy my Silly Sofy:

Tuesday, 4 October 2016

Wiggle - Day 3,044. The Last Day

Yesterday was the saddest day of my life.  The day I said my final goodbye to Wiggle.

After having celebrated his birthday last week, Wiggle's health and well being declined so quickly it came as a shock to me.  Thursday and Friday he only managed short walks and wasn't very hungry, only eating a few chunks of his tinned meat.

On Saturday I made him some pancakes with maple syrup but he didn't want them although he had always enjoyed pancakes before.  

I helped him up a few times and we tried to go for a walk but Wiggle only went to the end of the street and back.  By then, I was fearing the worst and my heart was breaking but I knew I had to do what was right for him.

On Sunday I called the vets and made an appointment for Monday afternoon.  I got Wiggle into the car and took him to my parents to say goodbye.  Still not wanting to eat much, I got Wiggle lots of tasty snacks to see if he could be tempted to eat and he did manage some ham and smoked salmon.

By Monday, Wiggle wasn't able to get up by himself at all.  I'd been sleeping downstairs with him since Friday and he had been trying to get up in the night so I helped him get to his puppy pads as he didn't want to go outside.  We didn't sleep much and after it had gotten light and Sofy had eaten her breakfast, I helped him outside but even that wore him out.

I knew it was the right time to let him go.  My handsome, special, loyal, clever Wiggle was too tired to carry on, even for me.  I put his harness on to be able to help him on his feet and he spent some time in the garden, sniffing the air.

Then it was time to leave.  Sofy said goodbye, licking his face and watching him as I got Wiggle in the car.  We stopped at Maud Heath on the way, Wiggle laying in the car feeling the warmth of the sun on his soft fur for one last time.  I hugged him and cried and told him how special he is and how much love I would always feel for him.

Once at the vets, Malcolm agreed it was the right decision and helped me get Wiggle up on the table.  Wiggle didn't struggle, just lay with me holding him, crying into his fur, stroking him and telling him how much I loved him.  His passing was peaceful; it was the right time.  

Now my heart is breaking for the loss of my one in a million boy.  He arrived in such a neglected condition and despite not being loved, he was ready to give love.  We had so many wonderful adventures and he was a great ambassador for Labrador Rescue South East & Central.

But he's gone, free from pain.  The pain left now is mine but in time the happy memories will take over.

Thank you to everyone who has supported Wiggle, chatted with him on Twitter and shared his life with us.  

Wiggle, 28.09.2002 - 03.10.2016

Wednesday, 28 September 2016

Wiggle's 14th Birthday

Today is a very special day - Wiggle's 14th birthday.  I honestly didn't think I would be lucky enough to celebrate this special day and to be honest, there have been plenty of days when I wondered if the time to say goodbye was growing nearer.

But, thankfully, Wiggle is still here and to celebrate, I took the day off work, packed some meaty snacks and we went to a lovely park for a birthday picnic.

Wiggle helped himself to his little lunch box while I drank coffee.

Wiggle then finished the froth from my latte and got plenty of it on his nose!

It's been such a lovely day that we stayed where we were, enjoying the fine weather and having plenty of cuddles.

Words cannot describe how much I love Wiggle and I'm not ashamed to admit that I have cried a lot lately as I know time is not going to last forever for Wiggle but I'm very glad we got to spend today together.  He really is a special boy.

Monday, 19 September 2016

Wiggle - Day 3,030

We're home again after our weekend in London for the LRSE&C Dogs Party.

On Saturday, Wiggle stayed at the house while Sofy, Haggis and Cato met up with Dougal and Oban for a walk in Wimbledon.  

Here's Sofy with Oban and Dougal after they had all been for a swim:

On Sunday it was Wiggle's big day out which he thoroughly enjoyed.  He got himself comfy and watched everything going on:

Highlight of the day was when Wiggle won Golden Oldie:

Wiggle was tired after his long day but thoroughly enjoyed seeing lots of friends and raising money for the charity.

Sunday, 11 September 2016

Sunday, 4 September 2016

Wiggle - Day 3,015

Wiggle enjoyed our few days away last week and managed a few short walks but was happy to relax at the cottage:

Since being home again, Wiggle continues to plod along at his own pace:

He still has enough energy to come out with Sofy most days, just to the green at the end of our street:

Handsome, senior Wiggle!